Lois Amy (Howard) Gunter
Gunter, Lois Amy (Howard), 94, retired from WSUs Financial Aid Dept. in 1980, died Sunday, June 7, 2009. Service will be held at 10:00 A.M., Saturday, June 13, Downing Lahey Mortuary East. Lois was a beautiful person, with a beautiful smile and positive attitude who lived an unusually rich and full life. Her parents, Alice and Alpha Howard, raised Lois and her five siblings on a farm near Ness City, KS. After high school graduation, Lois moved to Wichita and graduated from Wichita Business College where she met her future husband, (married in 1937), Preston “Mike” Gunter. Lois and Preston raised three children, took many road trips, played in a couples bridge group for 30 years, were active with the Silver Link Sunday School Class, attended many Shrine dances, entertained frequently, camped at RAFT in their trailer, and after Preston retired from the Police Dept. they managed the Hillcrest Apartments for a few years. After Prestons death in 1990 and until recently, Lois, to the delight of all who knew and loved her, was totally independent, driving, playing Bridge, doing the crossword daily, giving devotions at Sunday School, hosting parties on her patio, attending Red Hat functions, playing Upwords with her best friend, Carol, attending Branson shows, traveling in a motor home, babysitting her great-grandchildren and dining at the Candle Club. Of all her many accomplishments, she was most proud of writing a book about her mother, Alice, entitled, That Old Kentucky Blood, of which she had several dozen copies printed, and then gave to relatives and friends. Preceded by husband, Preston, sisters, Dorthea Underwood and Lola Kreis and brother, Bill Howard. Survivors: daughter, Judy (Knute) Fraser of Wichita; sons, Gary (Dianne) Gunter of Denver and Mike (Patti) Gunter of Austin; grandchildren, Mark (Carrie) Munzinger, Melinda (Darren) DeFrain, Carri Gunter, Brad Gunter, Lindsay Gunter and Brian Gunter; great-grandchildren, Nathan Lindsey, Anna Munzinger, Madchen and Ava DeFrain and Jayne Gunter; sister, Audrey Collins of Hutchinson, KS; brother, Ben (Mary) Howard of Merced, CA; many nieces and nephews, her special life-time friend, Carol Krebbs; and many dear friends. A special Memorial in her name (which will benefit low income children), has been established at College Hill United Methodist Church, 2930 E. 1st, Wichita, 67214, her church home for 65 years.
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Honoring Lois Howard Gunter Lois has been a big part of my life since I was ten years old. Over the years, Lois offered me sage advice, and in many ways this is the way I think of her, as a sage. Although there were times I was resistant to what she said, it always turned out that she was right. I’m thankful that on my return to Wichita I got to spend time again with my grandmother, Lois. One of my favorite things was going through her cedar chest and listening to her tell me stories about all the people she had collected in both picture and letter form. She was firm that ‘everybody has a story.’ Lois loved people and everywhere she went she tried to connect with them, even during her illness. Usually she asked the nurses( if they had the same last name as someone she’d known) if they were related to that other previously known person. Lois was constantly seeking connection and drawing people together. Our plan before she got ill was to write a family history about her husband, Preston, similar to what she’d written about her mother, Alice. Although we didn’t get to start work on the project, just going through the pictures and listening to her stories was wonderful. Lois’ interest and concern for others was coupled with a tough resilience. In December, crippled with arthritis, she played a round of Bananagrams with her great-granddaughter. In February she celebrated her 94th birthday. About a month before she died, she was able to play a last game of Upwords with her friend, Carol. When she broke her hip she was able to transcend all the pain to talk to her sons. On the day before she died in Hospice, she opened one eye, looked at my mother and somehow found the strength to say, ‘I love you.’ This was miraculous, given the fact that Lois had not been able to speak for days. Lois truly made the most of her time. She was charming with a lovely soul, and will always be remembered that way.
I offer these thoughts and memories of Lois Gunter, my Mom. Lois was an amazing human being, as perfect as I have ever met. She had a rough time the past 7 months, but for most of her long life she was extrememely self-reliant, active, content, happy, well-read, and had a more active social life tham most. We all very much appreciate the handling of her affairs, apartment, finances, health care administration, etc. by my sister Judy Fraser, and the help of her kind husband Knute Fraser. The last few months required a lot of decisionmaking and re-locations, all handled astutely by her loving dauther, my sister, Judy. Lois Amy (really it was Amy Lois, but only a few know that) was once a beautiful blonde gal, as pictures evidence, and she was a high energy person who held nothing back. She was emotionally honest and she was not a mystery in any sense. I believe her sincerity and balanced, down-to-earth sensibility, probably gained on the farm in depression-era western Kansas, were her strongest traits other than her work ethic. She was constant working and was literally doing my pool-cleaning work just last year, swearing it made her feel better. Lois was very intelligent, but also very simple. She had both life and people very well understood, and she had an adherence to principles that was unshakable. She could converse on almost any subject, and Im sure she read everything Readers Digest ever published. She was not timid in stating her views and had a propensity to add a new perspective, and to just be right. She struck a nice balance howerver, and respected other people – but just to the extent they deserved it. These were likely the key to her many life-long friends, and her ability to make new friends all the time, any time. I always got a little boost from being around Lois, even now. She, like my Dad, Preston, was both gregarious and helpful to other people. Hers was a life very well-lived. Congratulations on her completing of the course. We can all be assured that Heaven will now be getting cleaned up, scrubbed down, put into better shape, and made a bit more cheery. Mike Gunter Austin, Texas
Lois was part of my introduction to Melinda’s family. Melinda and I had planned to drive to Texas when we were dating and I had to pass muster with her mother and grandmother. So I drove down to Wichita to try to prove that I was no ax-murdering-fiend. I remember meeting Lois and her first how-do-you-do to me was: ‘Aren’t you a tall drink-of-water!’ I remember she always that excellent combination of Midwestern wit, a desire to have fun, and an amazing ability to calm young children — which we made frequent use of over the years. We’d typically drive halfway across the country to visit Wichita and we could always count on Lois to sit down with the girls and patiently play a game of dolls, answering all their questions with great sincerity and asking questions that stimulated the girls to think about the roles they were playing. And they’d become as calm and contented as Lois seemed to be. On the nights we were lucky enough to get her to sit with our girls (not that she didn’t want to, but she was always so busy), we’d come back from an evening out, having left Melinda’s octogenarian grandmother to sit with two little kids all evening, playing, feeding them, changing diapers, and getting them to sleep with more ease than we ever seemed to, and could count on her having a glass of pinkish zin in one hand and a mystery novel in the other. ‘Oh, hi!’ she’d say. We’d get the news about what they did that evening and then hear about what she was reading. Typically she’d comment that it was ‘a bit racy’ but she liked it. And she’d have the villain figured out or the motive deduced. She’d read well into the night after we left, get up early to do the crossword, tend to Ralph, and then set off on a busy day of her own driving all around Wichita to visit friends, go to church, or play competitive bridge. I remember that raised glass of pink zin at our wedding and other occasions wishing all good luck and the kind of peace of mind she seemed to enjoy: ‘Here-here!’ If we’re lucky, we’ll all get to live to be her age. If we’re really lucky, we’ll make use of the time the way she always seemed to. But I suppose we’re already lucky for having known her. Here’s to Lois. Here-here.
Dear Judy, Gary, and Mike, I was saddened to see your mother’s obituary in the paper this morning. i remember her from all those years growing up on S. Chautauqua, of course, and recently used to see her and visit some at the Wurlitzer Pops organ concerts. She was a lovely lady, always very classy, I thought. You were blessed to have her so long and in good health. Would love to come to her service tomorrow but we will be out of town. My thoughts and prayers will be with you all. Janet Studer Ward
She Saved The Last Dance For Me My mother is an easy woman to remember. Her love and patience knew no bounds. On a visit to Wichita last October, we went to dinner at the Candle Club and dancing after. My favorite memory is dancing with my 93 years old mother and trying to keep up. She will be missed by all of us.