Delberta Ruth Lind

I had the honor of being employed by Ruth for almost two years, helping her in her Andale, KS home. I learned from a friend who had talked with one of Ruth’s children, that Ruth was looking for someone to help her at home and drive her to appointments. So I met with Rich and Sherry and Ruth. I was hopeful that I could have the job because Ruth appeared to be such a kind and friendly person. I think that what cinched my being hired was when I’d mentioned to Ruth that I was raised in the home of a hoarder. She perked up and said she, too, had an area where she had been hoarding things and really needed help in getting that sorted out. Now the fact that what I could see of her home was totally well-kept, I wondered where this “room of doom” (as we later referred to it) could be located. I also may have mentioned that I liked to iron, because that was one of her special requests, to have her clothing precisely and completely ironed. So I eventually learned that I was hired and I began the great adventure of helping Ruth several days a week. I also learned that any ironing she wanted me to do seemed almost unnecessary to me…..most of my own things didn’t look as good as her pre-ironed things. But I loved pressing them to make them look as nice as possible, still feeling a bit guilty for being paid to do so. (I should be so meticulous with my own clothing.) I did whatever Ruth requested and always hoped I did it to her high standards. Occasionally she would have me make one of her favorite recipes, and I would follow them to a “T”, always making sure to add lots of onions if those were listed. I seem to remember her saying you couldn’t have too many onions. I still have most of those “Ruth” recipes written down.
Now here is a closing thought that I had written to Janice yesterday when I first heard that Ruth had passed: “I am so sorry to hear this. It’s a very sad lesson for me to pay attention to the reminders in my head. I have had Ruth on my mind so much lately, really a lot. I kept thinking I would get out to see her. I’ve been so wrapped up in my own grieving at the loss of my husband just two years ago, and more recently at the loss of my 92 year-old brother, that I failed to follow through. It is so hurtful to hear that Ruth is gone because there was no good reason to not be seeing her. She meant so much to me and I thought of her a lot. It was a wonderful experience going to her home and helping her. One of the first things she said to me, on my first day there, was when she had me sit down and listen to her tell me not to put myself down. I’d been talking about something that showed her I didn’t have a good opinion of myself. She set me straight right then and there, reading a particular scripture verse that I have written down and intend to find. She really cared about me and everyone else in her life. I can’t beat myself up over not getting out to visit her, because she wouldn’t like that. But I will always be so grateful and cherish being a part of her life.
From Martha Jellison Hole, Wichita